Then Black Napkin

The Black Napkin

Simply living your life, offers the opportunity to learn many things, IF you are paying attention. I learned a long time ago, to listen and to be present in the center of my life; I didn’t want to miss a thing.

I have been blessed to meet a lot of people, living at every level that life has to offer. It was within one of those experiences, which I learned of the availability of “the black napkin.”

For those of you that may not know, depending on what you are wearing or not, which for me is usually black, rather than simply using a white napkin in the restaurant, you can request a black napkin. Black napkins ensure that the white lint consistent with traditional white napkins won’t attach to that beautiful outfit you are wearing.

My purpose in life is the mission of Take2, realizing you can rejoin your life. Encouraging people to “not stop where it happened,” are where I am committing my life for the rest of my life. Life is never free of tough stuff. Some of us would say that what we have been through is rougher than what anyone else has gone through, and I get that perspective. It feels that way, until you hear someone else’s tough stuff.

Regardless, of what you have been through, or what you may be going through, if you have breath, there is a worthwhile life on the other side. It is so important to “not stop where it happened.”

You are probably wondering what a black napkin has to do with anything. I recently heard from a dear friend, that I knew, first hand was going through perhaps the worse period in her life. Divorce and the severing of a relationship is tough and the self-talk and messaging that can come from that experience can be brutal. I’ve been there. It is mind-blowing when you marry someone that you believe you will spend the rest of your life with, and you discover they are not who you thought they were. As a matter of fact, you don’t even recognize who they have become.

Divorce can destroy you on so many levels, and when it is not mutually agreed upon, it can be even worse. It is one of those traps that can keep you stuck in unforgiveness and shame. Those emotions can take you even further down a rabbit hole believing that no one can love you, or that there is something wrong with you.

Suddenly, our conversation shifted, when my friend decided to bet on herself and the God that she knows so well. No more were we ruminating about her self-centered, insensitive, verbally abusive spouse, but now life had blessed her with the kindest, most loving gentleman that she had ever known. She had discovered her perfect match. During their first lunch date, as was her norm, she asked the waiter for a black napkin. To discover, that every date after that first one, her love, ensured, without ever being asked or reminded, had a black napkin waiting for her.

Picking up the pieces of your life after devastation can be one of the hardest things you will ever encounter or endure, however, I promise you, if you will simply believe and move; your best life is waiting for you to arrive.

Tanya Wilson